- You would rather have a root canal than dinner. You really would, because it would put you on a liquid diet for a while
- Upon hearing the news that your family is going to a buffet for lunch, you actually leave the room and cry.
- You lose so much hair in the shower that you are afraid that it will clog and, upon investigation, the plumber will ask
you if you have recently lost a small dog.
- You look at the Food Network like it's porn. (LOL)
- You stare at cakes in the bakery at your supermarket like a man would stare if a naked supermodel happened to walk through.
- You, upon hearing of Wasted, immediatley go in search of it.
- You hear your grandparents discussing dinner and tense up, only relaxing (slightly), upon hearing that it will be chicken.
- You practically have a food readout in your line of vision. As your eyes pass over food, it immediatley registers the
total like the terminator's computer thing in his brain.
- You almost wish that you would get put into the hospital for a non-ana related reason because you see how much weight
people lose there.
- You freak out upon finding out that pickles are NOT zero calories.
- You openly stare at skinny girls until someone thinks you are a pervert.
- You frequently wish that, in resturaunts, along with the Kids' Menu and the Seniors' Menu that there was an Ana menu.
(consisting of lettuce, pickles, diet soda, coffee, gum and rice cakes).
- You could make a fortune selling (for wigs) the hair you have lost.
- You could use your lunch money to buy a car.
- When you know the layout of your local supermarket better than the people who work there do, but you haven't bought anything
there for several months/years.
- When you arrive home 30 minutes late because, having decided you were gonna binge, it took you that long to buy a chocolate
- When you catch yourself wondering if hearing sound burns more calories than not hearing sound.
- You know there's a parking lot right outside your work, but you still park 5 blocks away just for the exercise.
- You do laps around your kitchen saying, "Nope, can't eat that... or that... DEFINITELY not that..." then sit back down
on your couch and twitch to burn calories.
- You cut your hair, trim your nails, floss, shave, and pluck your eyebrows before you get on the scale, hoping for a difference.
- You wonder how many calories there are in the bits of food stuck in your teeth... and then floss just to get rid of them.
- You use a wide-toothed comb that vaguely resembles a rake and still manage to comb out a handful of hair the size of a
- When, while watching Cold Mountain, and all of your fellow girls are drooling over Jude Law, all you can think about is
how gorgeously thin Nicole Kidman is.
- You love laughing even more than you used to because it burns calories.
- You thank your lucky stars when you forget something upstairs or downstairs just for the excercize.
- You have purposefully gotten your locker put on the other end of the school from your classes.
- You crochet to distract yourself from food, and wonder, as you do, how many calories it burns.
- You wonder if breathing burns calories.
- A king sized candy bar, when you see it in the store, makes you short circuit.
- You used to go looking for the free samples in the store. Now, you madly avoid them, darting from aisle to aisle, humming
the theme from Mission Impossible.
- You have mapped out the grocery store in your head and have decided which aisles you will not go on. Under any circumstances.
- You fear the ice cream and candy aisles, and when forced to go down them either hold your breath or start twitching. Its
like water torture.
- When you want to eat, you sit yourself down in a chair and do mind over matter, refusing to let yourself get up.
- You have flirted with the idea of inventing a collapsable scale that you can carry in your pocket.
- Followed by a pocket calorie counter that you could type the food into, until you realized you no longer needed it, you
knew the cals in just about everything.
- You pace constantly to burn cals.
- You thank God for your habit of swinging your legs because it has to burn cals.
- You know your ana when you baysit you little three year old cousin and wish to fit her child size
- When you sneak a scale to a sleepover when you know your friend doesn't have one.
- When you ask for extra chores from your parents so that you can burn calories.
- When you are willing to climb five flights of stairs to your apartment instead of taking the elevator every day/night
so that you'll burn calories.
- When you hang up your little sister's pants in your room as a reminder of your weight goals.
- When you won't sample a food at the mall for fear of gaining weight.
- You wonder if singing burns calories (every song you sing burns 10 to 20 calories).
- You go next door to borrow a cup of Splenda.
- You wonder if driving burns calories.
- You constantly carry a book about horseback rididng or knitting or polo around with you in the library to detract attention
from the many Ana books you read inside it.
- When you can pin the exact calories that everyone is eating.
- When you stand in a museum looking longingly at a mummified skeleton wishing you were as thin as he is.
- When you hope to get extremely sick just so you'll lose weight. Hey at least it would be a great excuse to not want to
eat cause the rest or your excuses are running out.
- When you look forward to going to a work because you know you can't eat while you're there even if you wanted to. Plus
the work will burn calories.
- When you've got rough skin on your bum where the bones stick into the seat.
- When you have a line of bruises along your spine from sitting in straight-backed chairs.
- When you spend more in a month on gum and diet Coke than you do on everything else combined.
- You not only envy thin people of your sex anymore, but you also envy thin men, children, and even dogs.
- You love your dog so much for making the 70 calorie cookie that you could have eaten a 35 calorie cookie that you ate.
- You are extrememly suspicious of waiters and resturaunts and inspect all of your food before eating it to see if they
snuck in extra butter, mayonaise, etc.
- You, upon fully realizing the mayonaise has 100 cals per tablespoon, have not touched it since. At all.
- When you pray for mono or a tapeworm.
- When you haven't bought new clothes in forever but you are holding out until you reach your goal. (And we all know, reaching
our goal is like tomorrow, it never comes).
- You are driving your husbands car (or anyone elses) for the frist time in a long while and you wonder if driving stick
shift burns more calories; then you decide it must and think "I should drive this more often".
- You have a really bad stomach ache but you refuse to take pepto bismal until they email you back about how many calories
are in a dose!
- You would consider a position as a maid or hard labor just to burn calories.
- You turn down your father's offer to buy new school uniforms because... the others WILL fit in a month DAMNIT!
- Your shopping partner asks if you want to try something in a bigger size and you start crying.
- You've considered, even for the briefest moment, using a kitchen knife and/or a vaccuum cleaner for home liposuction.